Every day this week, I've taken Marshall outside to eat lunch. We sit on the swing in the back yard. I've watched the pecan trees bloom out with beautiful green leaves and other trees too. I watched a mocking bird make a nest in one of the bushes next to the front porch, which is like a sun room. It's been beautiful! And the most precious gift of all, is that I've been able to keep my youngest grandson and I've seen my other grandsons every day! Thank you, Lord!

On the other hand, I've cried every day, gotten mad and threw my face in my pillow and screamed. The flash backs of my husband hanging just torments me.  I also remember the good times, the funny times and the sad time that we went through together.  He was so very happy when our daughter was born! She was a blessing from God to both of us and still is a blessing to me. She, with Gods help has blessed us with 4 grandsons. Yes, one is my step grandson and I don't get to see him much, but now I'll get to see him more.

My heart still aches for Dale. I still have unanswered questions that will never be answered. Why? I know some of the reasons, but his pride got in the way. Why couldn't he stay with us? I needed him and he needed me. Our daughter needed him, our grandsons needed him. They still ask me questions, but I cannot answer them. I just tell them he had an accident. I promised my daughter that I wouldn't tell them. She will tell them when the time is right.

I read an article just today about a teenage girl hanging herself after being sexually assaulted by 3 teen boys. It broke my heart and brought tears to my eyes.

There must be a way that we stop others from suicide!